My Kids are My Kids

I don't think very much at all on a daily basis that my kids don't look like me. Honestly, I don't. When we first adopted JM, in the first month or so we had him, I was super sensitive to that whole thing. It goes away fast. I also had a super bad experience on this very issue right at that time, which didn't help. That another post for the future.

But I forget about how I look to others often. We stick out like crazy as a family when we come walking down the street. I forget, and honestly, I don't even notice the curious looks anymore. For the most part, I don't care either.

Today something cool happened, and it reminded me, we are easy to notice. We went to Target. Our Target is weird in that is has two stories. So you have the choice of taking your cart upstairs via the elevator, or a fancy escalator that has a separate track just for the cart. Just trust me on that one, you have to see it to believe it.

So we send our cart down the track, while we ride the separate track. Our cart gets stuck and the track stops. So we are waiting at the bottom of the escalator while an employee comes and resets it. JM and I are are standing at the bottom looking up.

We suddenly see a white man coming down the escalator with an African American (AA) toddler in his arms. They stick out easily. I lean over to whisper to JM, "Hey, do you see them? They are like us huh?" JM has noticed race more and more these days, and I am always trying to find ways to show him we are not the only ones like us. And I took this opportunity.

Well, of course, the man sees us! Duh! I forget that vision goes both ways. He comes off the escalator and we immediately strike up the conversation of where our children came from, what agency, how old everyone is, etc. His little bundle of energy is 18 months, and cute! They are hoping to adopt again in about a year. We also realized we live in the same neighborhood and should definitely talk and get the kids together. Very nice! Hope to get to know them soon!

I also noticed at the opening day of summer camp something I hadn't seen in awhile. JM is playing in the pool. And he is the only AA child around. I am fairly close to him in a chair by the side of the pool. He is not a great swimmer and is just hanging on the side of the pool and toodling around.

I see the look, and it's not a bad look, but it's a familiar look. A few adults did the "once over" look over the crowd looking for this little boy's parents thinking he is there unsupervised. Of course, they don't see me. I don't have an ax to grind here. It is normal human behavior to be concerned for this child, and look for his parents. I just think it's very interesting. As a person who likes to "people watch", with my family in the color that it is, makes for great people watching!

I have also noticed that when it is just me and the kids in public, the first assumption, and I would assume this as well, is that my husband is AA. Again, no ax to grind here, as human beings, we try to make sense of what we are seeing. But again, it's nice to blow the assumptions occasionally.

So anyway, in all my little adventures to day, I think we might have made some new friends, and that is always a nice thing.