My first post!

I feel the need to spew so much about myself since this is my first post. I am going to refrain from doing that to you. I fear that may prevent you from ever viewing my blog again.

I have enjoyed thinking about the idea of blogging, and have lots of thoughts that I would enjoy talking about with someone as well as have written somewhere. I am fulfilling the writing part, so I ask you, the reader, to please think about adding to the "talking" part by posting your comments and thoughts on issues I bring up, or related ones.

The things I find myself struggling with, wondering about, and worrying about--my kids. They are adopted. I say that proudly and boldly. I don't say that as a label, an indentity or a sentence for their future. I say that because we can't keep it a secret. The picture of myself on the main page is me and my older son, JM. We are a walking poster child for how great adoption is, yet, I find myself in conversations with people. They range anywhere from wonderful and tear jerking, to absolutely embarassing and awkward. By the grace of God, I can count the latter on one hand.

I'll share with you one of the wonderful conversations, and get this blog started right!

Jump back to June of 2005. We were in Prince George County, Maryland at a relative's house. We were taking custody of our second son, and we were emotionally raw. In the previous months, we had three adoptions fall through. Two of them were as a direct result of bad adoption workers. I have an opinion on that, and will share that later. (When I find myself saying, I have an opinion ..... I find myself wanting to blog!)

We have our second son, BH, in our arms and are enjoying some vacation time. Prince George County, Maryland is a dream place! It is where I want to raise my kids if I could afford to live there! Why? It is predominantly African American! If you walk down the mall, you will see a lot of African American people. But look closely. Depending on where you walk, of course, this is a generalization. No place is perfect. But where I walked down the mall and had my vacation--I saw African American families, with mothers and fathers. I saw children in school uniforms. I saw teens dressed like a teenager, not like an inmate about to be fingerprinted. I saw men in suits in carrying briefcases. I saw professional African Americans--and a lot of them!

Okay, this might bring up....where do you live AM? All the places I have lived in my life, I have never seen what I saw in Prince George County. Can you see why I want my kids to live there? Can you understand why communities there welcome with open arms the message that Bill Cosby has, and yet gets criticized by certain AA (African American) groups? His message is one of "Get an education, stop playing the race card, support your kids".

I am walking around this community with my husband, ML, JM, and our new baby in a snuggly. My husband and I stick out like crazy, yet, there are no harsh words or nasty looks. We go to a mall with some other family members to go to a pizza place. There is an AA man in the parking lot unloading a box of trophies. He obviously is a coach and is doing his awards dinner with the kids at this pizza parlor. I also see his son with him, about 8 or 9, in a uniform. He notices us immediately--again, we stick out. I don't remember how he approached us, but he was bold. He walked right up to us and said something like "Are your kids adopted? How are old you? (to JM) How old is this little guy? (for BH) How cool is this?" He just gushed for a minute or two. We explained we had just adopted BH and were going back to our home on the west coast soon. Then he dropped the wonderful bomb, "I am adopted. I was adopted by white folks and was raised in Illinois. You know what? I am not screwed up either!"

No, he isn't. After all he lives in Prince George County, Maryland, has great kids, coaches the team, and invests himself in his kids. I would love to meet his parents. I want to be like them, and I want my boys to be like this great guy.