My husband

This is so weird. I have been blogging for a few days now, and suddenly my husband is getting weird about this. Lemme explain.

First, when he came home a few days ago, I said, "Hey, I have a blog now!" His response--he laughed at me. You want to see me go from zero to ticked? Laugh at me like that. I walked out of the room.

He asks me later, "Okay, I want to see it." I logged him in and he read all my posts and has kept up on them since then. Suddenly today, he says, "You have written about everyone but me." Oh my word!

You have to know my husband to know how oddly absurd this behavior is. As I write this, I also have to keep in mind, he will read it.

This is what my husband is like. M is cerebral....and I mean, cerebral. M is brainy. He is a college professor in philosophy, theology and ethics. You know, light topics. Does he read John Grisham? No, he reads "The Critique of Pure Reason" by Immanuel Kant. Yes, he will read that on an airplane or before going to bed. He is working on his PhD which has something to do with Thomas Reid and common sense realism, and he's always reading something on that. If you listen carefully, he talks to his computer in Hebrew because he is learning that as well, and has some program that he talks to as he learns it.

As you can tell by my description of him, I am out of my league. I get asked all the time "How in the world did you two meet? Better question, what was dating like? What's it like around your dinner table?" The latter is easy, "Put your plate in front of you. Use your napkin, don't lick your fingers. Two more bites or no dessert." We are also parents of young kids which trumps a lot of things. The first part--well let's all be real here, weren't we all on our best behavior when we dated?

Not much bothers M. It takes a lot to upset him. He has a great sense of humor. For instance. Tonight he walks through the kitchen and pokes me in the behind. Since we have small kids, long chats are few and far between. Long chats that most women really enjoy and can actually lead to something nice later on. Sometimes I get really irritated that a swipe on my ass is considered a substitute for a long chat. I say it, "Do you think pinching my ass will get you something later?" He says, not skipping a beat, "No, pinching your ass will guarantee nothing for me later." Fifteen years of marriage, he knows me pretty well.

Anyway, things my brainy husband is good at. He is a gifted teacher. His students love him. Past students of his come to him years later with gratitude for the challenges he gave them and what he taught them. I have seen him teach--the dude is good. M is no lightweight either. Every semester--students come to the first class, get one look at the syllabus, and drop the class. You will get your tuition dollars worth of learning in his classes. You will also get put through some academic exercises and be the wiser for it. I will say it until the day I die, M truly loves the Lord with all of heart, soul and mind. Strength being on mind.

Things my husband does not excel in. He is not a handy man. I have girlfriends who have husbands who can build them new kitchen cabinets in a weekend. I have a girlfriend who's husband is putting an addition on their house as I type this, and it will be done soon. That's pretty extreme, I realize, but oh my word, that makes my heart skip. My husband can do the basics. We have painted rooms in our house. Give us some furniture to assemble, great. Major projects, like putting some drywall in the basement to finish it. No way. Yet, several of you reading this will go, "Oh yeah, my husband could frame in a basement and move the plumbing for you." Go away, I don't want to covet you.

Things I struggle with. My husband and I are both fiercely independent. If we aren't careful, especially with our schedules, we won't see each other for long periods of time. What's worse, we are fine with it. I learned that awhile back when he was working on his master's degree. I was so used to having his attention, and then suddenly I didn't. So I found other things to do while he was focused on his studies. I volunteered a lot. I worked out. (Hush, we know that hasn't happened in years.) I found other ways to fulfill my need for companionship, and I don't mean inappropriately. The girlfriend network is there for a reason, most men can't fulfill all of our needs for relationships. My brainy husband certainly can't.

So here we are now. I own my own very very lucrative candle business. I make good bucks doing it, and have a lot of fun with it. I meet a lot of new and interesting people. I have events I attend for it about 3-4 evenings a week.

My husband is a college professor. He is also working on a PhD degree by distance with a fabulous college in Europe. His nose is always in a book. If not a book, a laptop. We are on summer break right now right? His colleagues are off playing with their families and getting home projects done right? Right. My husband goes to the office daily to work on that PhD, learn Hebrew, get class notes for the fall going, etc. I can't wait until that PhD is done!! You have no idea!

It works for us, but we do have to be cautious. We are both confident as individual people. No insecurity, right? So where the heck does this insecure statement come from, "You have written about everyone else but me?" I repeat myself, oh my word! Where did that come from?

Just remember, I had to go to him in recent years saying, "Honey, can we set up a chicken coop and have chickens?" I am sure in the deep recesses of his mind, said muttered, oh my word!